heart gone awry

hurt. that's all i seem to feel anymore.
that's not good.
i should be above those trivial parts.
i am my own self, i do not need anyone else but God.
earthly treasures should mean nothing to me.
but it does.
f***/

at least i know God will never desert me.
and i have those who have not deserted me; i'm not saying you have.

i hate love, i hate friendships, i hate people. there. i said it.
i'm trying to find every piece of my broken heart; because the last time i tried to give it to someone, it shattered. then again, i didn't quite have all the pieces... but.. will i ever get it all again? who knows.

i need to stop.